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Department of Health and Human Service’s Children’s Bureau agrees with me that it’s unwise to lie about it, as dishonesty may be considered a red flag for the persons reviewing your application. Though you are not required to disclose your sexual orientation, a guide from the U.S. Legally, a single potential foster or adoptive parent cannot be disqualified on the basis of his sexuality (Mississippi, however, prohibits same-sex couples from adopting), but as you mentioned, the “optics” of a young gay man wanting to foster a child may leave you open to bias that can be coded in other ways on an official document.
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Nevertheless, unless there is a situation in which one or both of them will experience sustained anguish or hurt as a result of doing so (i.e., one of them scores very high while the other fails to meet the standards for her grade level), it’s fine for them to see the results. They may well be competitive you can make it clear to them that the tests are not a contest but an outdated method of measuring student aptitude that has been devalued by their own school, but you can’t prevent them from having any sort of reaction to a disparity in their test scores. (She will do better because she’s better at test-taking they actually get equivalent grades in school because their teachers take participation, attention, projects, etc., into account.) They are both high-achieving students in general, and I’m not worried that either of them will do poorly on these tests. (Gender non-conforming kids also deserve sleepover invites, by the way.)Ī complicating factor is that I’m fairly sure one of my daughters will score higher than the other, and she’s definitely not going to remain tactfully silent on the subject. And anyway, hetero kids and queer/bi ones that haven’t come out to their families are also quite capable of engaging in sexual activity with peers of their own gender when the door is closed and the adults have gone to bed for the evening.
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These gatherings are typically more about bonding over gossip, games, junk food, and Netflix than they are about getting physical. I wouldn’t recommend denying this experience to a bisexual or gay young person just because they are known to be attracted to members of their own gender. Sleepovers for kids and teens are typically same-gendered. This may be the rare occasion that this particular child experiences what seems like an advantage on the basis of their sexual orientation, but ultimately, it’s simply a heightened expectation of responsible behavior and honesty. Alas, equity is often elusive in a world that will present challenges to your bisexual teen that their siblings simply won’t have to face. I want to first affirm your desire to support your child’s identity and your desire to be equitable in how household rules are created and enforced.